Oh, Frightful Visage

Orange Bear’s encyclopedic and comprehensive research into facial hair hasn’t all been peaches and cream, wine and roses, and sweetness and light — no, no. How about muttonchops and handlebars? Funny you should mention…

Yes, dear reader, there are times that will try any enterprising bear’s soul. These are the times that Orange Bear cries out, “Mr. Crumpet, come back!” Yet only a terrible, haunting silence mocks his plaintive wail.

The Bono {‘bänō}
Muttonchops are muttonchops, and handlebars are handlebars, and never the twain shall meet.

Fear not, Orange Bear. The Bono is but a figment of a dream, a psychedelic dream. You need only to close your eyes to make it go away.

Says Orange Bear: “It’s burned into my mind.”