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The Future

November 16, 2006

After a long day, Mr. Crumpet enjoys spending time in his library (perhaps setting sail in an Aubrey/Maturin adventure).

One recent evening, he entered his library only to find — to his horror — that the shelves were empty! In one corner stood a single column of cardboard boxes, neatly stacked to the ceiling.

On the side of each box were printed, with black felt marker, four words in block letters: PAPER PRODUCTS, PLEASE RECYCLE.

“How strange,” thought Mr. Crumpet.

Then, out of the corner of his eye, he glimpsed something — something glistening on the tray table of his favorite armchair.

He walked over and picked up the black, 9-ounce, 4.9-by-6.9-by-0.5-inch metal device with a 6-inch screen. It felt cool to the touch.

Sony…Reader.”

Suddenly, the window curtains flew open!

Phil the Owl stood perched on the window ledge outside. His saucer-like eyes bore into Mr. Crumpet.

“Welcome to the future,” announced Phil. “Paper-like display with patented E Ink technology, 8:1 screen contrast ratio, and multiple font sizes; thousands of books in the palm of your hand; 7,500 page turns on a single charge; plus support for RSS feeds and digital audio!”

“But, Phil, books are for reading, and computers are for… internauting.”

“Bah!”

“OK, tell me,” asked Mr. Crumpet, “How did you put my books into these boxes seeing as how you’ve only wings?”

“Argument by distraction!”

3 Comments leave one →
  1. truce permalink
    November 17, 2006 2:59 am

    Ah, these things are all very well until they break or you spill tea on them. Then how are you supposed to follow the adventures of Stephen Maturin, Captain Aubrey and the crew of ‘Surprise’?

  2. November 17, 2006 5:11 pm

    Precisely! There’s no talking sense into Phil when he gets into one of his moods. Which is often.

  3. January 12, 2007 7:13 am

    Brilliant Website. Please take a look at my website. Let me know what you think.
    Maybe you will link to it…Thank You.

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